The Wedding

 

My heart exploded with love the moment I found out I was going to be a momma. For nine months I pondered my feelings for the tiny human kicking my ribs, how my life would change and what the future would hold. When my Sweet Tyler was born, I was awe struck with the love I had for him. My heart ached just watching him sleep. I transitioned into the role of Mom and love every single second. 

In the early days the most repeated advice I heard was to be present and enjoy each moment as it goes by in the blink of an eye. Truer words were never spoken. We lived each stage, walking, talking, birthdays, school, friends, junior high, high school, sports, all of it. We cheered, consoled, enjoyed, and worked to be present. I embraced being a mom, and picked up or dropped off, helped in the classroom, took walks and talked, cheered him on and was often a sounding board and a sympathetic ear. Each stage saw our relationship grow and change as his reliance on me gradually decreased. During college, his heart shifted further and my sweet boy, who used to order dinosaur nuggets and smiley fries, was enamored with a beautiful young woman. Ashlyn is sweet, focused, has an incredible work ethic and loves our Tyler with her whole heart. College flew by even faster with Ashlyn by his side and before we knew it our Sweet T in four years graduated with honors with his engineering degree all while competing as a D1 athlete; days are long, but years are fast.

I felt we would soon be having a conversation about marriage. We did. My heart swelled knowing he found his one. I loved her and her sweet personality and knew they would be great together. Inside I shed a couple tears knowing a stage of our lives was coming to an end, he would no longer be solely ours. He would build his own family circle and wouldn’t need his Momma as much. But I knew it was exactly as it should be.

He showed me the ring and talked through his proposal. On a cold, snowy, December day, the four of them, T, Ashlyn and their puppers, Elvis and Winston hiked mountain trails, through the snow to “take some fun pictures.” With his phone camera recording, Tyler dropped to one knee and Ashlyn said yes. We celebrated with Ashlyn’s parents, Kevin and Wynette, and talked about our babies getting married. The date was set for August, and it seemed we had plenty of time to plan, and then we didn’t.

In the blink of an eye wedding week was upon us. My heart flip flopped as my boys headed off for the bachelor party, knowing in one-week, Sweet T would marry Ashlyn and I would officially, no longer be the first woman in his life. I reflected on the changes this day would bring for all of us Their time together has been filled with wonderful moments as well as difficulties and sorrow but together they will continue to tackle the curveballs life throws. Their wedding day wasn’t going to erase hard times, but they would lean on each other more and lean less on us. They would create a stronger bond and foundation for their family.

The morning of the wedding arrived. As with all things there were minor hiccups, a forgotten shirt and tie, no table linens, but it all worked. The small things were inconsequential in the grand scheme of the day. Countless trips back and forth from the venue to the lodge, decorating, setting up, the combined effort of putting things together, and suddenly it was almost time. With the walk down the aisle minutes away, I watched cars roll in, one after another, the wonderful friends who wouldn’t have missed the day.  My heart smiled as people we love arrived after juggling long drives, flights, schedules and making arrangements to be with us to celebrate Tyler and Ashlyn. I realized as I looked around how our family included amazing people not joined to us by blood.

When the moment arrived, I walked down the aisle on Tyler’s arm. Tears of joy and change bubbled near the surface as I hugged my son and sat down. The wonderful friends who stood up for Tyler and Ashlyn, including our Austin, made their way down the aisle and then the music changed. Ashlyn walked with her dad, radiant against the lushness of the mountains. Tyler’s eyes were full of his bride as they exchanged rings and vows. With a kiss and flourish we had a new Mrs. Dahl in our family.

The celebration began with tables full of people who knew our son at different stages in his life, people who love him completely and thoroughly. People who will now love Ashlyn just as readily. I floated from table to table watching old friends meet new friends, family making connections with friends, neighbors who are more like grandparents, people from work who became life-long friends. Each connection made me realize our entire circle consisted of beautiful people with similar values, beliefs, and habits. I knew Tyler and Ashlyn could call anyone sitting there and every single one would be willing to help, lend an ear, offer advice or even just a hug.

I paused often to soak in the atmosphere. Thankful for the beautiful family that joined us, laughter, dancing, sidebar stories and conversations, and the melding of family, friends and loved ones. Thankful for sweet gestures of help, hauling cakes, making so many of the wedding implements and decorations.

Between dancing and talking I engraved snapshots in my memory for eternity.

Watching my nieces and nephews arrive,

The pictures on the Memorial table,

Tyler’s face the first time he saw his bride,

Ashlyn and her mom getting her dress on in the yert,

Walking down the aisle on my Sweet T’s arm,

Watching Tyler and Ashlyn’s first dance as husband and wife,

The mother/son dance and countless other moments.

I will remember my girlfriends old and older becoming fast friends, my nieces tearing up the dance floor, my husband, nephews, and friends huddled up to share pictures and hunting stories. I will treasure seeing Kevin sit quietly with his granddaughter, seeing Wynette rock the dance floor and getting Wes to dance with me. Each moment reminded me of the beautiful family we created and the new family we celebrated.

On a beautiful, bright day in August at 9,000 feet in the mountains Tyler and Ashlyn stood among the wildflowers, under the brilliant sky and said I do, I do to creating their own beautiful love story.